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Joke #20
Q: Why doesn't Austin have a professional football team?
A: Because then Houston would want one.
Joke #19
Q: Did you hear Matt Schaub just threw his iPhone in frustration?
A: It was intercepted and then returned for a touchdown.
Joke #18
Q: How many Texans fans does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None they are happy living in the Titan's shadow!
Joke #17
Q: How many Houston Texans does it take to change a tire?
A: One, unless it's a blowout, in which case they all show up.
Joke #16
Q: What does an Houston Texans fan do when his team has won the Super Bowl?
A: He turns off the PlayStation.

Joke #15
Q: Why are so many Houston Texans players claiming they have the Swine Flu?
A: So They don't have to touch the pigskin!
Joke #14
Q: What Does the Houston Texans and the movie "Broke Back Mountain" have in common?
A: They both have Texans that suck!
Joke #13
Q: How did the Houston Texans fan die from drinking milk?
A: The cow fell on him!
Joke #12
Q: What's the best way to teach your dog to roll over and play dead?
A: Have him watch a couple Houston Texans games.
Joke #11
Q: What is a Houston Texans cheerleader’s favorite color?
A: Yeller.
Joke #10
Q: How do you recognize a Houston Texans player in a department store?
A: He's the one trying to slam the revolving door.
Joke #9
Q: What does a Houston Texans fan and a bottle of beer have in common?
A: They’re both empty from the neck up.
Joke #8
Q: What's the difference between the Houston Texans and the Taliban?
A: The Taliban has a running game!
Joke #7
Q: What's the difference between Texans fans and a litter of puppies?
A: Eventually, the litter of puppies grows up and stops whining.
Joke #6
Q: How do you casterate an Houston Texans fan?
A: Kick his sister in the mouth

Joke #5
Q: What do the Houston Texans and possums have in common?
A: Both play dead at home and get killed on the road!
Joke #4
Q: What's the difference between Texans fans and mosquitoes?
A: Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer.
Joke #3
Q: What do Texans fans and laxatives have in common?
A: Both irritate the absolute crap out of you!
Joke #2
Q: What do the Houston Texans and Billy Graham have in common?
A: They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ".
Joke #1
Q: How do you stop an Houston Texans fan from beating his wife?
A: Dress her in an Indianapolis Colts White and Blue jersey.

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