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Joke #20
Q: Why do most Manchester United fans book 2 seats to every nickname game?
A: One to sit in, the other to throw when the fighting starts.
Joke #19
Q: Name three football clubs that contain swear words?
A: Arsenal, Scunthorpe and F*****g Manchester United.
Joke #18
Q: Why did god invent alcohol?
A: So Manchester United fans can get laid too.
Joke #17
Q: What is the difference between a Man U fan and a baby?
A: The baby will stop whining after a while.
Joke #16
Q: What does a Manchester United fan and a bottle of beer have in common?
A: They are both empty from the neck up.
Joke #15
Q: How do you stop a Manchester United fan from beating his wife?
A: Dress her in a Real Madrid jersey!
Joke #14
Q: What do you call a Manchester United fan with half a brain?
A: Gifted.
Joke #13
Q: If you see a Man U fan on a bike, why should you not swerve to hit him?
A: It could be your bike.
Joke #12
Q: what is the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead Manchester United fan?
A: Skid marks in front of the dog.
Joke #11
Q: What do you call a Man U fan with no arms and legs?
A: Trustworthy.
Joke #10
Q: How do you castrate a Man U fan?
A: Kick his sister in the mouth
Joke #9
Q: What’s the difference between a fat chick and a Man U striker?
A: Even a fat chick scores every once in a while!
Joke #8
Q: Two Man U fans jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground first?.
A: Who gives a F**K!
Joke #7
Q: What is the new Man U official cologne creating a lot of buzz?
A: You wear it and the other guy scores.
Joke #6
Q: How do you keep a Manchester United supporter from masturbating?
A: You paint the Real Madrid logo on his dick and he will not beat it for years!
Joke #5
Q: Did you hear about the new Man U Bra?
A: Lots of support but no cups.
Joke #4
Q: What do you get when you cross a Man U Fan with a pig?
A: We may never know, there are some things a pig just will not do.
Joke #3
Q: What do Manchester United fans use as birth control?
A: Their personalities.
Joke #2
Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
A: Ask a Manchester United fan!
Joke #1
Q: what is the difference between a Manchester United fan and a vibrator?
A: A Man U fan is a real dick.




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